A little form of immortality

Lunedi, Monday, August 5, 2013

I have been enjoying my time on the lake with my daughter and her boyfriend. We have gone INTO the soft and silky and refreshing lake a few times, soaking up the coolness of the wet and the warmth of the sun. We found a little spot across the street with steps down into the water. The bottom steps are very slippery getting IN and OUT of the lake: so we bought a rope to attach to one of the OLD metal rings used to tie boats up along the shore. My tall skinny friend.... Mom to Ana Julia who visited earlier came for a few days visit from switzerland. I love Stephanie: she is bright, open, curious and direct. As girls would do- we spoke seamlessly for hours, having not seen each other in a couple of years.

I have been thinking about immortality lately, as I heard from a couple of folks from 30-40 years ago. One from Wheaton days. One from my days in the travel agency, arranging a senior trip for a client. One from when I taught at Venice Junior High School in 1973 & 74. That was a long time ago. I was a young twenty something.... reaching out to capture the minds and imaginations of budding pubescent beings. Optimism was paramount and the whole world was open. I remember thinking, even then: what is the sense of my work- of my life??? Those thoughts came on the heels of knowing that for a year, I might captivate a kid's enthusiasm to learn and to think. I then realized that if this same kid got a boring, or 'downer' of a teacher, all of that energy spent might very well be squelched. It appeared almost fruitless.... my endeavor of making an impact that might last.... And so the self questioning of "What is this work I do, all about?"

I had to steer myself into a mental place where it HAD to make sense and seem of value. So, this is what I came up with, and has become my definition of immortality. I concluded that if I touched a kid and even for a MOMENT, or a YEAR and allowed them to feel good about themselves..... that ALONE would be a benchmark for them to go back and KNOW that they were capable. It would have to be a gift for those kids to KNOW that they could reach into their emotional back pocket and feel valuable and powerful.

Since energy is neither created nor destroyed, it makes sense that the energy I have imparted be transformed into another form.... for something good and positive. Being a conduit is a form of living forever. It is a worthwhile legacy.

I have been thinking of this, as I read an email for a student for 1973, who said "I am a mother of four. I have thought of you often and the kind of impact you made on me, and feel sad that none of my children have ever been touched by a teacher the way you touched me." Humbling and powerful.... and gives credence to those self questioning thoughts I had so many years ago. I am touched and grateful to know I have made a difference, 40 years later.

Life is about who we touch and how we touch. That is the imprint, the point.

I feel good, validated and valued.

Have a great Monday.....from the lake, with smiles and warmth

Judy