Venerdi, Friday, August 2, 2013
My son is 32 today. My dad was 93 two days ago. That circle, again. One man beginning his life and the other in the waning part of his. One man with a first love of his life. The other WISHING he had ONE LAST love of his life. Or, perhaps- just a snuggle and a snatch of something feminine.
I called my Dad on his birthday, but was advised NOT to speak with him as he had been agitated all day. He was trying to escape the memory wing of the assisted living facility which is now his home. He kept saying that he wanted to leave and go live with his wife Beverly in Colorado. The sad thing is that: he has NO WIFE. And, Beverly, his former girlfriend lives in Bradenton- NOT Colorado. He was SOO BAD, the nurse called my brother Eddie who is 'in charge' of all things HOWARD (Dad). Our father said to Eddie on the phone "YOU USED TO BE THE GOOD KID. The NICE ONE. What happened?" I loved it. It is true, Eddie was always the 'angel' in the family. I obviously was NOT. And, I was always reminded of that detail. So, I loved hearing he might have been demoted after 64 years! Life is good. He was so agitated that he was given an adavan. God Bless medicinal solutions! At least, I know that the nurses were appreciative at that moment.
I felt that I had been a dutiful daughter in calling. The fact that I didn't get to speak with him: was irrelevant. The point was that I CALLED and was paying attention.
And in the middle of that circle, my daughter and her boyfriend arrived yesterday. I had the biggest poo-poo eatin' grin on my face all day. This was their first peek at our new home: Carlyle said "Mommie, it is fantastic. I am proud of the work you did!" Validation at its best. Approval is such a necessary attribute for self esteem. Particularly from those who are close and particularly when it is rare to hear. This few weeks will give her a much needed perspective in determining what she wants in her life as she 'grows up'. She has been stuck, me thinketh. Perhaps this time in Italy will give her a nudge, to let her know that the world is indeed HERS for the taking and giving.
I picked them up from Como city in a friend's borrowed old Fiat Panda. A car at its very basic. Nothing extra: no radio. no air conditioning. no electric windows. But, it went forward when commanded, stopped and went into reverse! I needed nothing more. The kidlets and I strolled the village, stopping for a drink/s and appertivo, sipping in the slow life along the lake in summer. They are excited to be back here. It is home for my daughter who has spent many years here. There is something that reaches deep inside of her, and completes her. Perhaps it is the carefree memories of summer when she had her brother, mom and dad all to herself. No school. No work. This defines her differently than Sarasota.
Went to bed at 7:00pm. A drop dead fabulous sound sleep. Woke up at 11:00am and had a bite to eat with the kids and chatted for an hour before I continued my horizontal retreat. Today is marcchetino day.... and life cycles around to the beginning of another weekend. The weather is glorious- sunny, a slight breeze which caresses the face. I will miss not having my son here today on his birthday, as each year for 2 decades we would celebrate with a very large PARTY, with the townsfolk. An American party for the little American boy who grew up here in the summers.
Happy Friday, and thanks for reading. Please Please continue. Yeah for your support.
Smiles,
Judy
No comments:
Post a Comment